5 Ways to Heal from Birth Trauma

Published on August 19, 2024

It’s one of life’s cruelest situations. After nine months of excitement and anticipation, the process of childbirth is traumatic. Keep in mind that trauma is in the eye of the beholder. So, while there are general guidelines about birth trauma, only the mother can decide how she feels. The same goes for the pregnancy itself. A wide range of factors can result in a traumatic pregnancy, which, in turn, dramatically increases the odds of birth trauma.

Left unchecked, any of the above issues can lead to postpartum post-traumatic stress disorder. Since PTSD can have detrimental effects on the mother and child, you must learn more and get the help you need. 

What Can Cause a Traumatic Pregnancy?

What feels frightening and dangerous to one mother-to-be can feel like a minor annoyance to another. So, again, the pregnant woman must be heard, validated, and trusted when she reports feelings of distress. Some typical causes for such distress might include: 

• Being the victim of a crime

• Suffering an injury

• Mental health problems

• Medical emergency

• Pre-term labor

• Early contractions 

• Strife with family or the baby’s father 

What is Birth Trauma?

Some of the risk factors for a traumatic pregnancy are red flags here, too. This might be marital strife, injuries, mental health, etc. Other catalysts for birth trauma are any type of medical emergency that requires the infant to be sent to the NICU. Life-threatening emergencies that put the mother at severe risk might be perineal tearing, hemorrhaging, or the decision to perform a hysterectomy.

Other Birth Trauma Risk Factors 

• The birth is extremely painful

• The medical team uses tools like vacuum extractors or forceps

• Unplanned C-section

Birth trauma can also be the outcome because any hospital birth is stressful. It’s a challenging environment that often leaves the mother feeling powerless. They have very little control over the choices being made, and that could include who is allowed to witness or participate in the process. Any of this can be very difficult for a mother to recover from. 

Common Signs of Birth Trauma 

While any new mother can be stressed after childbirth, the symptoms of birth trauma are more extreme. They often mirror classic signs of trauma like intrusive thoughts, nightmares, hyper-vigilance, and flashbacks. More specific to birth trauma are signs like:

• Thoughts of harming the baby

• Unwilling to be separated from the baby or no desire to be with the baby

• Not bonding with the baby 

• Feeling too exhausted to care for the newborn

• Self-blame and self-shame

5 Ways to Heal from Birth Trauma

1. Validation

It may feel like no one gets it, but do not let that make you question yourself. You’re not “overreacting.” Your emotions are valid and worthy of respect.

2. Acceptance

You don’t have to sugarcoat the experience for the sake of outsiders. If you were traumatized, you need to accept it and be around folks who also understand.

3. Get Practical Help

Every new mom needs help. In the case of birth trauma, it is especially crucial that you ask for help with chores, errands, and other tasks. 

4. Resist Black and White Thinking

After what you’ve endured, it’s not unusual to expect the worst-case scenario from now on. Working with a therapist who understands birth trauma can be a giant step toward gaining a healthy perspective as you move forward. 

5. Try a Support Group

Talking with other new mothers — in person or online — who have had birth trauma can be incredibly validating and provide much comfort and solace.

A big part of healing from birth trauma involves respectful treatment. I invite you to reach out for the kind help you deserve.