Why ADHD Can Contribute to Low Self-Esteem
Consider all the symptoms that come to mind when you hear “ADHD” (attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder)? You might conjure up images of distractibility, forgetfulness, constant movement, and more. But how many of you will connect those four letters to self-esteem?
ADHD is a condition that will, unfortunately, provoke some misguided criticism. Sometimes, those negative assessments are spoken the loudest by your own inner voice. You get mad at yourself for being unable to stop behaviors that are deemed unacceptable or inappropriate by mainstream society. If left unchecked, this pattern can erode one’s confidence and bring them to a place of low self-esteem. Why does this happen, and how can we prevent it?
The Connection Between ADHD and Self-Esteem
The traditional signs and symptoms of ADHD often result in:
Negative feedback from others — including parents, family, friends, and partners
Struggles at work, school, and home
Losing items and forgetting important information
Fear of being judged
Difficulties maintaining healthy relationships
Self-criticism, self-judgment, and self-sabotage
All of the above (and more) contribute to the stigma surrounding ADHD. You may begin to feel anger and shame. There’s a greater likelihood of social withdrawal. This carries over to all aspects of your life.
ADHD is Not a Curse
This isn’t bad luck or a judgment on your character. ADHD is a diagnosable disorder that alters how your brain functions. It’s not a statement about you; you can take powerful, self-loving steps to counteract the symptoms. Let’s focus on that!
People with ADHD Can Elevate Their Own Self-Esteem
Adults
For starters, self-education can go a long way in building self-esteem. When you learn that most people with ADHD struggle with similar concerns, you’ll understand that you’re not uniquely flawed or alone. This reduces self-blame and emphasizes learning from others about the coping skills they’ve developed.
Another source of balance can involve you actively choosing to focus on your internal strengths. You didn’t ask to be diagnosed with ADHD, but you’ve definitely used this reality to allow the best in you to rise to the top. Get out your journal and make a list of the attributes you regularly use to manage your daily life. Take pride in your efforts and resiliency.
Another option is to seek out friends who inspire you, support you, and want the best for you — and vice-versa. A strong social network doesn’t have to be huge to make a huge difference.
Children
Since most people are diagnosed during childhood, kids can also take a self-esteem hit. However, studies show that their parents can have a major positive effect when it comes to self-worth. If your child is showing signs of low self-esteem:
Be vocal and consistent about acknowledging their strengths
Encourage their gifts
Don’t get caught up in comparing them to anyone else
If they do something wrong on purpose, firmly let them know but be less automatic about scolding them for making mistakes
Cheer their successes — big or small
Guide them to become more organized and embrace routines
Be generous with your affection
Having a reliable source of support and guidance can be a game-changer for any child. For those with ADHD, it can make a massive difference as they navigate a world designed for neurotypical people.
Getting More Help When Dealing With Low Self-Esteem Related to ADHD
Besides the self-help steps listed above, people with ADHD can benefit greatly from ADHD therapy. Learning how to identify and halt negative thought patterns is a valuable method of maintaining self-confidence. Also, support groups can be a valuable way to gain validation and reassurance. If you or your child need help with issues about ADHD and self-esteem, I’m here for you. Book an appointment today.